Feb 10, 2014

Re-blogging

The year 2014 marks the 3rd anniversary of my abstinence from blogging. Time to call the penning drought off... time to rain my thoughts, feelings and nothingness.

The last few years saw a lot of changes in my life, family, work and just about everything that surrounds me. Changes are always good.. they invigorate, challenge, set aspirations, they make me do "more". A very personal change has also come about...so personal that I can say that it has changed me forever. It has stacked in me layers of patience and the resilience to be strong and not be hurt or not let anyone hurt me.

I think about so many women who surrender to these changes but then I think of others who make the change work for them. Women who see light at the end of the tunnel, accept the change with arms wide open and hearts opened up even wider. Whilst submission seems comforting in the short term, to me the "soul-call" overpowers that and energizes the mind and body to not cave in! To survive.. to propser and to accomplish.

Over the weekend my son and I were playing the card game UNO and the first game we played he lost. He was devastated, tears were running down his eyes and his disgruntled look brought out the preacher in me to step up. My first reaction was.. to wind up and not play anymore than my mental shelving placed motherhood on the top rack and I could find myself dealing another round of cards for the next game. As we played I kept on saying how much fun it was to play and learn cool new tricks as oppose to just win out of sheer luck. Three games went by, my son couldn't turn the odds in his favour... but the transition I noticed in him from one game to the other was his attitude. To me it read like... "Bring it on.... I'll learn... dooesn't matter if I win or lose". The fourth game he won and won purely due to his strategy. I lost and won at the same time. My son now knows that a whole lot of losing can make him win in the end if the right efforts are re-directed in the right direction.

Changes in life are pretty much like a lost game... its jut time to revisit the moves and reconsider the end goals. Whilst some may see the goals diffrently to others... its the vision that counts. The vision of being true to ones' self. The spirit to combat with one's own surrendering and the willingness to accept these changes as a way forward. I am dealing with one such change right now and digging for powers within me to not just exist.. but exist with a purpose, a smile, an objective and exist to be happy.