Raabta - reasons that heart knows not

Raabta - A song that brings me to tears... 

Kehte hain:
Khuda ne iss jahaan mein
Sabhi ke liye kisi na kisi ko hai banaaya
har kisi ke liye
Tera milna hai uss rab ka ishaara 
Maano mujhko banaya tere jaise hi kisi ke liye

Kuch toh hai tujh se raabta 
Kuch toh hai tujh se raabta
Kaise hum jaane, hume kya pata
Kuch toh hai tujh se raabta
Tu humsafar hai
Phir kya fikar hai
Jeene ki wajah hi yehi hai
Marna issi ke liye

Soul searching

Here I am

Soul searching again

With droplets of rain

And early morning dew

Only one missing is you 

You touched my soul 

My tears,my whole

Then we stayed in our being 

And here I am recounting that feeling 

But woes of gloom surround me 

The droplets of rain pour the pain 

It hurts to know that I'll never see you again

It hurts even more that I'll never rest my head on your shoulder and share my pain

The streets I walk will be alone forever

With no stars seen together not now, not ever

The thought of death on my own grapples me with fear and you nowhere in sight
Death was to do us part and now it's just us living our parts

No twinkle in my eyes, no soft smile across my face

It hurts to accept that life will be this

It pains even more that there is no tomorrow

While we had our chance we missed the choice and
 life now has other choices.

This I never imagined, to be shunned

be stilled and be muted in feelinggs not once but twice

It perhaps is bygone and pointless reeling and mourning
The price I paid I suppose, in being nice

Time shall heal and so shall I wait

With all the love and not any hate!

Here I am soul searching again

With joys and sorrows all but in vain!

Loving from afar

Just finished reading the book loving from afar by Mona Ingram. It was indeed after a long time that I took to reading a romantic novel. Generally a technology packed magazine or a crime fiction find more space in my library then the "knight in shining armour "novels. 

A run of the mill romantic book with lots of sadness but a happy ending. 

Good luck to those who can turn a sad story into a bright ending ! Well of course that is the point of such novels.. Who wants to read reality anyway ? 

In my humble opinion people who love from afar is where they stay and should stay ! Along the way they create memories and that is what they take with them when it is time to bid adieu. 

An OK commute novel ! 

Dedication

When distance makes it hard and decisions make it impossible, wishes and hopes portray the best! Here is wishing ... Your wishes to be true! 

I am who I think I should be

In a world full of connectivity tools, social media and a raft of talk and text applications it is almost impossible  to breakaway completely from the always "on-line" state!

It all starts with toddlers and extends all the way to the seniors. A two year old child watching nursery rhymes and singing and dancing to the video on a tablet. A five year old playing a game of "hungry crocodile" on a smartphone, a ten year old watching youtube tutorials on mine craft on his PC, a group of 10 year olds watching the same tutorials but with shared smart devices or sharing an online presence! A teenager, texting and talking with his friends! He then pauses a little before each time he responds. A lover constantly checking the chat window waiting for his/her lover to respond! The corporate executive crunching emails on their mobile while at the dinner table. 

Yes there are umpteen number of articles capturing the action they missed around and outside  the phone/tablet or PC while their focus was drawn completely into their screen and out to another soul somewhere in cyberspace. So I won't be elaborating on that since we know all too well what it could or could not have been that they missed then. 

However, I am more willing to concentrate on the fact that each virtually connected inidividual is online but with pauses. They hold a bag of voluntary and involuntary pauses. I refer to that pause as "image building" time. I almost feel that the generation in the modern era is so spontaneous in making information available with Google and other searc engines  that it is forgetting the art of delivering information spontaneously. 

While we pause to respond to a message... We write, backspace, restyle, edit, check, re-read and then print! Would we have got so much time to think about our response of it were a face to face chat? Certainly not! So why are we not letting others perceive us as who we are ? Why do we want them to perceive us as who we may not be but like to be.

I am... Because I Text... Says no one... But this is getting more to be a fact than a quote dwelling in my imagination. These gadgets are making us control freaks! We have started living in a world of programmed emotions! We are deceiving ourselves in the perception of our very own self! The containment of emotions and restructuring them to more impressive responses will let itself lose in other ways! These other ways... Is something that I am still studying about.. 

More to come... Stay tuned!

Cheers

Meghna

Traditions

So year on year we attend our son's annual school function and see him grow, learn and transform into a better performer. 

This year as I was dropping him off back stage in preparation for his act, he said, "Mum, just leave me at the front door, I'll manage the rest." I could not believe the words! I smirked and said, " it's our tradition darling, can't let you go just like that!"

The 9 year old suddenly changed into a teenager when he said, " One day...I'll be big enough to take myself in, mum!" With minimal fanfare I bid him adieu, wished him luck and receded to my car. 

Before heading back and starting the car engine my mental pause catapulted into a physical pause leaving me to recapture the whole episode again. The rewinding took less than 2 seconds but has perhaps left a stamp on forever. 

There are always traditions and then there is life. I believe as a parent, I need to learn to be more accomodating in his independence and his ability to thrive and prosper as an individual and not just under my shadow.

Three hours and 7 different performances later he came out all smiling, recharged and a winner. I must admit I had the proudest smile on my face. 

I'll probably leave my son at the front door next year...and I will leave a bit of my over protectiveness at the back door. 

Dedicated to all mothers who find it hard to let go - just like me! 

Christina Perri - Jar of Hearts [Official Music Video]

One of my favorite (blogger forces me to spell in American English) songs.... has been for quite some time. I believe this singer is missing the due credits she deserves.

Sunshine

The monsoon went by, the skies were still grey and the soil damp from rain last night. My spirits were more damp than the soil and the rays escaping through the clouds captured the glorious movements of a colourful butterfly. My spirit swayed between the gloom and shine. After a few minutes, gloom gave in and the warmth of the shine took over. Does seem like if its a dancing butterfly that can take away the gloom - life is all too simple, isn't it? Well, perhaps not. To me that dancing butterfly is my spirit, to me that is the willingness to see past the gloom, the courage to look for sunshine. 

The moon still shone and the sun trickling through through it prowess! Representing the two shades of life and here I stand with all my questions which belong to all shades in-between. Amongst all this the butterfly still looks as elegant in its style and its ephemeral beauty.I do have a lot to learn and even more to achieve.